Ok Marae trip
Are the events in time order? E.g.
We met in the hall...I was waving out to the children as the bus sped off down the road...When we arrived at the Marae, we patiently waited at the gate ... After the pōwhiri I was busting to go to the toilet...
Is it in the past tense? E.g. Was, left, woke up, etc
Does it use time connectives?
e.g. next, meanwhile, within hours, soon afterwards, weeks later, etc.
Does it use powerful verbs? Powerful verbs can make your writing much much more exciting and dramatic!!
E.g. Grabbed snatched sprinted scrambled shouted screamed crawled leapt strode yelled exclaimed glared
Is the last line linked to the introduction / does it have a good conclusion?
W.A.L.T write a thank you letter
Features of a letter
Is the letter formal or informal?
Is the address in the top right hand corner of the page?
Does the date of the letter come underneath the address?
Does the letter start with Dear… or another type of greeting?
Is the reason for writing clearly given in the first paragraph?
Is there a clear beginning, middle and end?
Does it keep the reader interested -using well chosen words?
Has the letter been signed offcorrectly eg. Yours sincerely, yours faithfully etc.
As we hopped in the bus there were children sprinting to the gate.They were saying hello. I was sitting next to Reagan I never knew that Reagan was sick . And I said hey Reagan you can sit next to me. Rosie said that is a good choice Issraa you're welcome. About 20 minutes later with a proud voice! We are there. As we got welcomed to the Marae. I was rushing to go to the toilet. I was shivering from the cold weather. We had to go in groups. After the groups we got inside at last. Then we had to do owner mihi. I had to go back because I couldn't sleep at the Marae. the next day I went back and we went to the gorge walk .It was a long walk I was tired after that we went back to school. We got to play in owe play ground.